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Monday, May 30, 2011

Jim wearing galoshes, rummaging through peoples' personal stuff

Danger Bakker in rain boots
Bakker caps off the week with, what else? Disaster discussion. He opens the show wearing rain boots and reading from that dumb restaurant menu of his (it's actually a book). From there he goes back to Morningside to wrap things up. The layout back in Morningside has Jim and Mondo seated aside Lori, who is smack dab right in the middle of the frame. Jim welcomes Lori back, and Lori seems ecstatic to be back on tv. She seems oblivious to the fact that Jim has been visiting flood and tornado ravaged areas all week. She wears a bright and shiny 'hey look at me' smile for the cameras; to Lori, the recent flooding and tornadoes that Jim is so riled up about may as well have happened on the moon.

Danger Bakker has arrived
We see a lot of clips of Danger Bakker running around saving the world. There's Jim on a boat, there's Jim in the water, there's Jim entering a house with a dust mask on. To the elderly viewer it would appear that Jim can do just about anything he sets his mind to, except pay his taxes of course.

Jim and Mondo profiting off tragedy
We see Jim sticking his snout into other peoples' personal belongings. He's showing us some poor family's Christmas ornaments in a box. Then we see him and Mondo holding some kid's teddy bear. At one point as Jim and Mondo play off one another, the NOW News van is spotted in the background driving in. I assume it's coming back from a donuts-and-coffee run for Jim and Mondo, with Mondo footing the bill.

Would Joe Namath approve of this?
At one point Jim and Mondo obsess over the fact that one of Joe Namath's homes was hit by a tornado. I can't confirm that Joe Namath actually owned the home, I'm sure the man owns a lot of homes though so it's possible. They have this whole cute little discussion about Namath, and the show puts his picture up twice. After Jim's satisfied that he name-dropped Joe Namath enough, they move on. It was weird though.

All of this eventually culminates with a product pitch. Jim has the standard foodbucket, but now he's moving into hand sanitizer and pup tents to supplement the main product line. I don't think Bakker has any humanity whatsoever inside of him, he's just a warm-blooded ghoul looking for any low-cost product he can resell at a higher price. I imagine Jim must be positively gleeful whenever some newsworthy natural event occurs, as it represents an opportunity for him to move more product.

Jim tells us that God spoke to him and told him there would be more flooding around the world in June. I like his 'worldwide' disclaimer, giving him enough slither-room to take credit for just about any tragic event that happens in or around water next month. Jim mentioned that the word God gave to him was 'too morbid to say', and that people should pray for him (to ease his burden one would assume).

The show closes with Jim talking about an asteroid striking the earth. This is the second time I've heard him mention this over the past couple weeks. I think Jim is honestly hoping for an asteroid to strike the earth so he can sell more Seychelle filter straws and Iodide pills.

1 comment:

Nedzo said...

"NOW" is the time!! LOL!!
I need a "NOW" Cap NOW!!